The Power of Storytelling

     Sharing your own stories with your children to illustrate a lesson you have learned over the years is a powerful teaching tool. Everyone loves a story. You can be almost certain your children will listen with better attention to a well told story as opposed to advice. Almost no one likes to be told what to do. Through the telling of a story, a child's mind is opened up to the possibilities in a situation. Of course, the story must be told in such a manner that it holds the child's interest. To do this, think back on the stories you found interesting as a child. What was it about them that moved you or excited you? Oftentimes it is as much in the telling of the story as it is in the story itself. Using expressive language and voice helps.
       You might think that you don't have any stories worth telling. I'll bet  that you do! There are many times in your life when you have made a decision that was the right one, or the wrong one. Why did you make that particular decision over other choices and how did it work out for you?
     You may not have climbed the highest mountain or fought crocodiles in Africa, but you have had to make many decisions as you grew up. The wisdom you learned from your experiences can help your children as they grow.

Keeping the Parent/Child Relationship Dynamic

In the parent/child relationship there are things happening every day that mold and change how the parent and child interact and how they view each other. Over the days, weeks and years, these things become more important and eventually will shape the relationship when the child is no longer a child. Here are a few suggestions of what a parent can do to help that relationship become a healthy one that is good for both the parent and the child.
--Let your child know the he/she is unique and that they know things you could benefit from.
--Send him/her a handwritten note with your reflections on your relationship.
--Don't try to impress your child that you are perfect. Let them know you are aware that you have your imperfections and
   you are trying to deal with them.
--Share with your children the stories of your life and the stories you remember of your parents. Write them down.
--Keep a journal of the life of your children from the time they are born until they are eighteen. Present the journal to your
   child when they are about to have their own child.
Perhaps you have some other ideas. Please share them with us.

How Important is Listening?

       Have you ever been talking to someone who is looking around, obviously not paying attention to a word you are saying? Has your child ever spoken to you when you had something more important going on? Just how imortant is it to listen? I think it's very important. Rachel Naomi Remen, author of Kitchen Table Wisdom and My Grandfather's Blessings has the following to say about why it is so important:
       When we listen, we offer with our attention an opportunity for wholeness. Our listening creates a sanctuary for the homeless parts within the other person.That which has been denied, unloved, devalued by themselves and by others. That which is hidden.
       In this culture, the soul and the heart too often go homeless.
       Listening creates a holy silence. 
       When you listen generously to people they can hear the truth in themselves, often for the first time.
       And the silence of listening, you can know yourself in everyone, the unseen singing softly to itself and to you.

Giving Inspiration

How do you inspire your child(ren)? How can you develop a positive, helpful relationship with your children? 
Here are some ideas:
 + Recognize that your child knows things you could benefit from. (Perhaps it is nothing more than looking at life and   our world with a sense of awe.)
+ Send your child a handwritten note telling him/her how much you appreciate them.
+ Yearnings are a part of our body's wisdom. Yearnings are a potential strength. Help your child identify yearnings.
+ Recognize that our strengths give us great satisfaction in life.
+ Watch for rapid learning. It is probably a strength.
+ Don't impose, but evoke your child's innate knowing.
+ Don't try to impress your child by claiming to be perfect. They need to know it is okay to be imperfect and to make mistakes.
+ Respect and bring forth your child's uniqueness.

You may have other ideas. Please share them with us by hitting the "Comment" line below. Thanks.

Motivating Our Children

        We all want our children to succeed. To "succeed" is defined by the dictionary as "to turn out well." I think that would mean not just doing well in one's life work, but also being happy and feeling a sense of satisfaction. So, in our troubled world and fast paced lives, how can parents instill such things as happiness and satisfaction in their children?  I believe one way is to develop in children a love for others balanced with a love for self. Some might disagree about the love for self, but I don't see how one can have love and respect for others without having it for oneself also.
        With the above as a foundation, children can explore the world with curiosity and passion. They will have the courage to dream and set goals; they will have the compassion to make sincere friends; they will develop the wisdom to make the right choices. Having done these things, they will have joy in their lives and will have lived with purpose. In a word, they will have succeeded.
What are your thoughts on motivating children?

A Bright, Soapy Idea

     An idea occured to me last night while I was in the shower. Ideas often do that--come to me in the shower. I believe this happens to a lot of us. Allow me to digress for one moment. Why is it that ideas come to us so easily while we are standing naked in a confined space, water beating on our bare bodies, face full of soap, and nothing to write with? Ah, another of those great mysteries that some day quantum physics will undoubtedly solve.
     Now, back to the main point. The thought I had was that I need to let you know the purpose of this blog. Otherwise it just seems like mindless rambling, which I don't mean for it to be.
     The actual purpose is for parents to have a place to brag on their children, tell the world how great their kids are, what they did that was so special. It's also a place to ask for help. Have a difficult situation and not sure how to deal with it? Perhaps if you post it here, some parent who has had that difficulty in the past can pass on their wisdom to you. Viola! One parent helped another with good practical, down-to-earth, how-I-did-it information. Or, if no one has had that situation before, perhaps, one of us will be taking a shower and--Aha! the soap goes on the face and the brain kicks in.
     So that's how it works. I hope you will feel free to add your comments, related or not, to whatever I write. I look forward to reading from you soon.

Train Whistles and Stories

     I love the sound of a train whistle at night when I'm about to fall asleep. I grew up in the same house where I lived until I turned seventeen and left home for college. The house was four blocks from a railroad track and every night, without fail, a train would whistle its way along that track as I lay in my bed, my eyelids heavy with sleep. There was something about the sound of the train that I found comforting.
      My bedroom was shared with two younger brothers. Often, before going to sleep, I would tell them stories that I made up during the telling. Sometimes we got too loud. I know that because our parents would call out from the next room admonishing us to be quiet. We would quiet down for a few minutes, but it wasn't long before we were at it again. This time, a trip to our room from my father, would quiet us down for the night.
     We generally behaved our parents, but a good story is  a good story and nothing could stand in its way. And that's my point--everyone loves a good story. I hope you are reading good stories to your children and encouraging them to read them on their own. Reading beats TV. With TV, we are passive onlookers. With reading our imaginations must work to fill in the holes and if it is a truly good story, we are transported to places we have never been before and, perhaps, could never go.
     If you don't have a good children's book in your house, go to the library or book store and pick one up. Read it to your child tonight. Read it with passion. Be that train whistle providing comfort to them as they fall asleep.